If you were ever that kid who preferred “The Black Cauldron” to “Aladdin” or “Courage the Cowardly Dog” to shows like “Recess,” Graffiti artist, Banksy, has created a temporary theme park that just may be up your “not so happily-ever-after” alley.
Nestled in Weston-super-Mare, a seaside resort town in Somerset, England, Dismaland makes its depressing debut for a grand total of 5 weeks. Don’t know if it’s worth the trip out to the UK? Banksy describes it as “a family theme park unsuitable for children,” so take with that what you will.
Because pictures are worth 1000 words (and because I don’t think you would believe everything that I tell you this place is) here are some highlights and attractions you would find in what I’m sure would be in Walt Disney’s nightmares:
How about that customer service? What better way to start off your day than by a glum half-willed smirk with giant dismal words glooming in the background? Hey, at least she’s wearing bright pink. That’s sort of promising, I guess.
I feel like this should be one of those pictures that your Driver’s Ed teacher shows you to scare you out of ever feeling safe while driving. I also think there’s something to say for the fact that the photographers look like a freaking SWAT team. I guess that goes to show how unsafe pumpkins really are.
I actually think this a somewhat accurate representation of what a writer’s life feels like half the time. Granted, my room is a bit more well lit, but I have definitely made enough paper balls to make a small forest cry. However, I’d rather pay to be distracted by fireworks and dancing silverware; the realist approach is no fun.
This reminds me of a mixture of the playground at Sunnyside in Toy Story 3 with the giant fans from Teletubbies. If that isn’t trippy enough, there’s way too many eyes everywhere for this to seem normal. Definitely not my cup of tea.
I don’t know if I find this cruel because one – the shark is jumping out of a toilet, or two – he’s landing in a kiddie pool with next to zero hope of fitting through the hula-hoop. Either way, he’s had a rough life.
You’ve never been on a carousel until you can ride a butchered horse upside down. Take that Disney. That being said, I think that particular horse might just be for decoration, but at least you get pseudo-Walt Whitman staring at you.
If you really can’t take anymore magic tea cup rides and thousands of small, sweaty children, then hustle your way to the UK, because this exhibition is only open through September 27th. However, if you prefer carousel rides without dead horses and butchers, you might just want to tag along with CAB and attend Disney World on fall break. Then you at least can see Mary Poppins feed the birds and not get attacked by them.